and so it ends

[rone]

Dear Ronny,

As a result of Adobe Systems Incorporated's acquisition of Macromedia, Inc., we regret to inform you that your employment will terminate because we simply don't have a clue as to how to integrate a company your size; therefore, we would rather move on with as few employees as possible to give each of them a vibrant new opportunity to work 70 hours a week, and thus give those of you we're laying off the chance to laugh at our ingenuousness.  I mean, ingenuity.

This is an actual quote:

There will be no bumping rights in connection with this reduction in force.

What the hell are "bumping rights"?

Comments

[twillis.livejournal.com]

The lay-off thing is not fun, been through it a few times myself. Don't know if it's any consolation, but each time things ended up better for me.

Getting laid off is weird - the first time it happened, I experienced an interesting mixture of relieved giddiness, anxiety and feelings of rejection.

Sucky to be sure.

[ronebofh.livejournal.com]

I am relieved but not giddy, and i feel rejected but not anxious. So, yeah.

[twillis.livejournal.com]

I can handle anything well except anxiety, so that sounds pretty good combo to me.

The first big layoff was one of those situation where just about every month they let another batch of people go, so it was mostly a matter of waiting for the axe to fall. Morale was pretty dang low. So that's where the giddy relief came in, for me.

[2wanda.livejournal.com]

Hi almost to be married lady. Did you get my email?

[twillis.livejournal.com]

That's no lady, that a twillis!

Wait, I told that wrong.

Erg, no! I didn't get an email. I hope I didn't mistake it for spam. I've been doing that a lot lately, apparently.

(Did you send it to tdwillis at earthlink?)

[ronebofh.livejournal.com]

Yes, she did.

[twillis.livejournal.com]

Well, hmmmm. I could see me having killfiled you, but I kinda like Kim, so that's pretty strange.