rone: (Default)
[personal profile] rone

I was musing to myself on the train to work today that, in my dotage, i will be offering a class at the local junior college, "How to Eat Pussy". It's a necessity for every straight man. I will be there, grey and dignified, clamping my lips around a Fleshlight in front of 25 barely-out-of-high-school punks who wouldn't know what to do with pussy if they fell out of one, and teaching them the immortal alphabet. And they will LEARN how to please a woman, because if they want to please themselves, they goddamn well don't need a woman for that.

Date: 2002-08-28 09:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] merde.livejournal.com
And they will LEARN how to please a woman, because if they want to please themselves, they goddamn well don't need a woman for that.

oh, thanks. now that they know, i'll never get laid again.

but just in case, make sure you cover the following critical topic: "If you won't go down on her, don't expect her to go down on you, asshole."

Date: 2002-08-28 11:28 pm (UTC)
ext_8707: Taken in front of Carnegie Hall (quiet)
From: [identity profile] ronebofh.livejournal.com
Definitely. Dan Savage's latest (http://www.thestranger.com/current/savage.html) has a twist on that critical topic (search for "hot for butt lovin'").

Date: 2002-08-29 01:35 am (UTC)
ext_181967: (Default)
From: [identity profile] waider.livejournal.com
I think Andrea B. Previtera has a few recipes involving cats... oh, wait, I see what you're doing. That pussy.

Date: 2002-08-29 10:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ikkyu2.livejournal.com
This would be why I didn't tell my mom about my LiveJournal.

eep

Date: 2002-08-29 11:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] een.livejournal.com
my poor virgin eyes. I think the last thing I ever expected to hear from you is " you gotta know how to eat pussy"

what happened to mean bitter rone? hahaha

:)

<3 yOu!

Re: eep

Date: 2002-08-29 03:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gallifreyan.livejournal.com
virgin eyes?

He can be mean bitter rone, and still help guys deal with other mean bitter things.

And it's not until you hear your doctor utter the words "angry scrotum" that you realize that sometimes things that should be funny really aren't.

pee

Date: 2002-08-29 06:45 pm (UTC)
ext_8707: Taken in front of Carnegie Hall (evil)
From: [identity profile] ronebofh.livejournal.com
Getting laid on a regular basis does wonders to getting the bitter out.

And, hey, knowing how to eat pussy is a good way to keep it regular.

Re: pee

Date: 2002-08-29 09:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] een.livejournal.com
i'm scared. mommy.. hold me!

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rone: (Default)
entombed in the shrine of zeroes and ones

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