and so it ends

[rone]

Dear Ronny,

As a result of Adobe Systems Incorporated's acquisition of Macromedia, Inc., we regret to inform you that your employment will terminate because we simply don't have a clue as to how to integrate a company your size; therefore, we would rather move on with as few employees as possible to give each of them a vibrant new opportunity to work 70 hours a week, and thus give those of you we're laying off the chance to laugh at our ingenuousness.  I mean, ingenuity.

This is an actual quote:

There will be no bumping rights in connection with this reduction in force.

What the hell are "bumping rights"?

Comments

[ronebofh.livejournal.com]

I think that the people who worked for companies that Macromedia acquired, at least during my tenure, were all treated well and fairly. I don't know if any of them were laid off, but i don't recall hearing about it.

We do have severance pay, and there's this thing called the WARN Act (http://www.doleta.gov/programs/factsht/warn.htm), too, upon which California has made some improvements (http://www.edd.ca.gov/eddwarn.htm).