bronx bombers blew badly

[rone]

At Esquire, Scott Raab gets his rant on:

Why Bud Selig lets the Yankees turn the 7th-inning stretch into a faux-patriotic ritual — not so incidentally forcing the opposing pitcher to wait an extra five or so minutes while the microcephalic Ronan Tynan quavers his meandering way through "God Bless America" — is a mystery. No other team or town pulls this sort of crap. It's no tribute to America — it's a tribute to George Steinbrenner's sense of entitlement and his monomania, and it's a disgrace to the game.

If another team pulled this on the Yankees, Steinbrenner would raise hell, and he'd be absolutely right to do so. And if the Yanks' pitchers could miss bats the way Tynan misses notes, the Yanks might've had a prayer against the Tribe.

And that's all the gloating I intend to do. There are Clevelanders like Steinbrenner — whose idea of manhood is bullyragging, boasting, and buying respect — but most of us know that sportsmanship means winning and losing with as much dignity, perspective, and grace as one can muster.

In other words, fuck the motherfucking Yankees. In their house. With Paul Byrd. With Joe Borowski. With Rudy Giuliani in his precious little VIP box. With Rocket pouting, feet up in the trainer's table's stirrups, as the team gynecologist pries apart his Hall of Fame labia. With the dickweed Michael Kay babbling about how the Yankees are the better team.

Right. It was the gnats. It was A-Rod. It was Bruce Froemming. It simply isn't possible that the better team wasn't the Yankees, because that simply can't be true in Bombersworld. Just count the ringzzzzzzzzzzzz...

Bye-bye, you sorry bastards. Oh, and God bless America.

Mmmmmmm.  Tasty.

Comments

[vspope.livejournal.com]

God Bless America doesn't belong there.

But at least it isn't fucking Cotton Eye Joe.

[cheesetruck.livejournal.com]

That's cuz Cotton Eye Joe is Swedish.

[ikkyu2.livejournal.com]

Fuck this guy. The Yankees are the motherfucking team of motherfucking 9/11 - bitch - and don't youse motherfucking forget it.

[jwgh]

Not the Mets?

[cheesetruck.livejournal.com]

but most of us know that sportsmanship means winning and losing with as much dignity, perspective, and grace as one can muster.
---

Um, what, he lives on some other planet? Cuz on this one, we have the states, and they don't know this. There isn't one 'success' in the states right now, from the leadership in government to the leadership in business and then there's sports, well we already are talking about Steinbrenner aren't we...

Shit never falls far from the asshole.

[mononeuron.livejournal.com]

> Why Bud Selig lets the Yankees
> turn the 7th-inning stretch
> into a faux-patriotic ritual

The man's a dressed-up chevy dealer.

A used-car salesman.

Really.

My brother used to work for the guy.

Rips off everybody he touches.

He's got late-late-show commericials in his blood.

Shamless, totally, utterly shameless.

If 7th inning faux-patirotism sells (anything), he's on it.